Chimera

02/10/2026

The Chimera is a Greek myth; a blend of menacing creatures representing chaos. Horrific as she may be, the lived experience of the Chimera is ridiculously complex and full of beautiful contradictions. The Chimera is originally symbolic myth, but here I am drawing a philosophical metaphor (I guess?) to my lived experience. As a trans woman, I’ve not lived a linear life with one cohesive narrative. My past and my present are very different from one another, but constantly intra-acting. The intersections of my multifaceted self are powerful, generative and dynamic.

It’s a major confidence boost, in that I am proud of the unfathomable amount of change I’ve undergone, and the wisdom I’ve gained along the way. I’ve been so many iterations of myself that I can understand and relate to most people very easily (on my good days). My spirituality is well-informed and depthful.

It’s the most depressing thing imaginable, in that I am alone in doing so, and no one will ever understand what I’m experiencing. Further, I am persecuted for it–the Utah state government right now is making laws that dictate how I can and cannot exist in my own skin.

There is untold depth in being a Chimera. For better and for worse. I am simultaneously divine and demonic, an unnatural beast formed of contradictory, synthetic parts. A misunderstood mess of different identities, bodies, ideologies and spiritualities housed in one being. Like a tide pool teeming with chaotic lifeforms, between the dry land and the vast ocean I hold infinity within me. No amount of explaining or metaphor will suffice. I am loved, I am feared. I am many, I am one. Thus is the life of a Chimera.

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